Friday, March 19, 2021

PRE-ORDER NOW - Everybody Fights: So Why Not Get Better at It? by Kim Holderness, Penn Holderness

 






My wife drives me crazy sometimes. My husband should already know what I need. Is our marriage in trouble if we fight all the time? Is it possible to learn how to fight?

For the last several years, Penn and Kim Holderness have done the hard maintenance and the research. With the help of their marriage coach Dr. Christopher Edmonston, they break down their biggest (and in some cases, funniest) fights. How did a question about chicken wings turn into a bra fight (no, not a bar fight; a bra fight)? How did a roll of toilet paper lead to tears, resentment, and a stint in the guest bedroom?

With their trademark sense of humor and complete vulnerability, Penn and Kim share their ten most common Fight Fails and how to combat them. Throughout the book, they offer scripts for how to start, continue, and wrap up hard conversations. Couples will emerge equipped to engage and understand, not do battle—and maybe laugh a little more along the way.

In Everybody Fights, couples will learn how to


conjure the magic of metacommunication
break free of secret contracts
banish the three Ds—distraction, denial, and delay
carry their own individual baggage while helping each other deal with theirs
Penn and Kim metacommunication want people to know they’re not alone. Marriage is messy. Marriage is work. But marriage is worth it. Fight for it.





My Rating - 5 Stars!


If you know Kim and Penn Holderness from their videos, you will love their new book Everybody Fights: So Why Not Get Better at It? If you don't know who they are, I'm sorry, you're really missing out. 

Kim and Penn are known for their humor, and it comes out in spades in this book. They are open about how they fight and the way therapy has helped them to fight more productively. 

The info included isn't all new to me, but damn, this is by far the best way I have ever seen it presented. It's honest, funny, and completely helpful. Best of all, it's sound advice offered in a fun, easy to read package. 

If you are ever going to read a book about help in your marriage, this is the book to read!

As well, I find this book can be helpful and useful for arguments with anyone. A parent. A sibling. A co-worker. A friend. Anyone. Although written for both side of the argument to understand the "better" way to fight, I see that just one person knowing the useful way would be extremely beneficial. 

I seriously love this book. If you're a fan of Kim and Penn, this is a great look at the people behind the video. Their personalities shine throughout. They give you an up close look into how they balance their family, marriage, and work lives. 

They repeatedly remind the reader that they are not therapists. But they heavily focus on some of the things that their therapist has taught them that can help all of us. Basically, it's a much cheaper version of therapy for yourself and it's wonderful.

Everybody Fights: So Why Not Get Better at It? is a must read book as far as I'm concerned. You might not relate to everything that Kim and Penn are saying, but you will definitely learn a thing or two, if not twenty, on a more productive way of fighting and communicating. 

And again, if you haven't yet seen the Holderness's videos, do yourself a favor and look them up on You Tube. Be prepare to binge watch them though as they are hysterical. 



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